when the times are hard

The world is a sea of pretentions.Fools pretend to be intelligent , cheats pretend to be honest , foes pretend to be friends, and all of us go through such stress trying to be what we are not.We are so mindful of what others think of us.

We fear hate and rejection. But what i have learnt so far is that trying to please others is like trying to move a mountain.there are very few people who are really happy with one's success.Whenver I have achieved something , with the exception of my family and a few close friends ,I doubt people have really felt happy for me . Hence I have acquired this care-a-damn attitude about what others think of me.I hate to pretend and always try to be my own self.Its difficult but once you acquire this ,it can be the most comforting and liberating attitude to have.I am still pretty loveable because I am a kinda fun character to be with.But I doubt how many of them will be around when bad times come upon me.

Its easy to be the centre of attraction at the party time ,cracking jokes and sharp ,witty one liners .What is difficult , is to find a person to talk to when you dont have any joke to crack.Its easy to gather "friends" for the party a class topper throws , what is difficult is to find a friend who will listen and comfort you when you fail the exam.Its easy to find people for company for a stroll in the garden , what is difficult is to find a friend to accompany you during a hard trip under a burning sun.And I realise that there will be times in my life when there will be ill have to make this hard trip,when i will have no wit to entertain nebody,when i would have failed.It is in these times when a true friend is needed.And for this true friend , i would not need to pretend.The friend would not need me to be someone he /she desires,but would accept me for what I am.Who would like me not for being at an Engineer , not because I have a good job but would like me for what I am , and not for what I have done or not done.It is so very difficult to find such a person , but to find him / her , you dont need to pretend to be someone else,but to just be urself.

Don’t know the above crap would make much of sense for u, but for me it always,and is nothing new , but just wanted to write it down , just wanted to express how phony this world can sometimes be.