During my PG in Bhopal ,in the cold severe days,everyday after chomping on some unidentified un-flying object for breakfast at a resturant nearby our room. I used to fill a cup of hot steaming tea, and go to the little ‘terrace’ kind of thing we have in our college days. The terrace at above my small room.Our terrace is much more unglamorous . It has got some stacked in a corner and a couple of biscuits wrappers thrown in another and even a broken washbasin lying in another . But every morning , I go there after my breakfast .The sunshine feels warm , and I sip the tea , and I flip through a copy of the Times of India. I liked this terrace thing, until around 10.15 am every morning.
Because as I stood in the sunshine and stared at the horizon and lazily sipped the tea and watched our washerwomen passed by . I looked at her , she looked at me , and somebody in a room , started playing “Humne tum ko dekha , tumne hum ko dekha , aise , hum tum sanam , laakho janam , milte raho ho jaise.” Ok , nobody played the song .Instead , this followed –
Washer woman – “ Aaj aap paise denge kya ?”
Me ( looking straight down in the cup of tea)- “ Jee…umm..actually..”
Washer woman – “Saab , pichle mahine ka bhee rehta hai 200 rupya….”
Me( thinking that the tea should have had more milk in it )-“ Jee , main samajhtaa hun , but main kya karu….”
Washer woman ( looking amused ) – “Saab , main saamne hoon , chai ke cup mein nahin.”
Me (looking up at her) – “He he…umm , dekhiye , main aapke paise pakka dunga , and jaldi hee dunga , please kuch time de deejiye.”
She let me go with a “Theek hai saab , but please jaldee paise de dena.”
24 carat gold. That is what her heart is . You can make a dozen gold biscuits by melting her heart. She let me go. Because she understands the plight of a man who is unemployed.Yes , I am unemployed. Kangaal. I was not this way since my birth . I was born in a financially stable family. And I remebred the night almost four years back , when my dad called up. My dad is as predictable as a hindi movie , when he calls me up.
Dad – “Haan bete”
Me – “Haan papa”
Dad – “Everything fine ? ”
Me – “Perfect , papa.How is everything at home ? ”
Dad – “Perfect , bete.”
Now , I swear on Hema Malini’s eyes , Dad always asks about the padai likhai after this. But this night , he did something else .
Dad – Golu, you withdrew more cash from the ATM , did you?”
Me-“Yeah , went out to eat some popcorn , and needed the money for that .”
Dad – “So you bought some popcorn with that money.”
Me – “Yeah, salted popcorn , and a little ticket for the movie I watched while eating it.”
Dad – “Ok. See, Goluu, you shall be managing a family of your own in some years”.
Dad went on to mention terms such as money management , kid’s fees , life insurance policy , money management , family budget , house loan and money management. But then I decided to join in the conversation and before I knew , Dad was mentioning phrases such as “how dare you reply to me like that”, “what do you mean” , “shut up” , “shut up I say”. And I ended the conversation with a “Ok , main aapko apne pairo pe khade hokar dikhaunga”.I hate it when I remember dialogues from hindi movies.
So now I am standing on my own feet , without any money .Later on the things between me and dad were fine again , and he has been asking about the weather with no mention of ATM card over the last six. But I feel I have been spending too much , it is like my “andar ka accha beta” has woken up and decided to save daddy’s money .
So I have kept away my ATM card and decided not to touch it before a specified date. And the side effects have been quite stirring. At that point of time I was having only seven rupees as my cell balance . I was fine as long as I talk to people who call me up. Was fine as long as I dnt call back boys who give me a missed call and expect me to call back. But I get restless if some girl gives me a missed call and expects me to call back. In such a situation , and with seven rupees as my cell balance , I am unable to call back and am left watching my interaction with the female species drop to abysmally low quantity.
The mohalla’s departmental store wallah observes the change in my eating habits.
Me – “Woh ‘Hide and Seek’ pack kitne ka hain ?”
Store guy – "12 rupya"
Me – “Oh , who Bourbon pack kitne ka hain ?”
Store guy – "15 rupya"
Me – “Ok.cool.Ek Parle G de do.”
Store guy – “Kya navin tu bhee , Engineering college main padne walo ko bade paisa wali naukri milti hai , tab bhee Parle G ?”
Me – “Swad bhare , shakti bhare , barson se .Parle G !”
I wish I could tell you I love Parle G , but I cant tell you this , because I don’t like Parle G, never . But with a four rupee price tag(during those struggling Edays) , it looks like a creamy bourbon pack to me for that moment of time.
So I wished I cud have done all the things at right time and wish to hope that somehow , someday , when the washerwoman asks “saaab , paise denge kya ?” , I wont have to look down into the teacup.
Because as I stood in the sunshine and stared at the horizon and lazily sipped the tea and watched our washerwomen passed by . I looked at her , she looked at me , and somebody in a room , started playing “Humne tum ko dekha , tumne hum ko dekha , aise , hum tum sanam , laakho janam , milte raho ho jaise.” Ok , nobody played the song .Instead , this followed –
Washer woman – “ Aaj aap paise denge kya ?”
Me ( looking straight down in the cup of tea)- “ Jee…umm..actually..”
Washer woman – “Saab , pichle mahine ka bhee rehta hai 200 rupya….”
Me( thinking that the tea should have had more milk in it )-“ Jee , main samajhtaa hun , but main kya karu….”
Washer woman ( looking amused ) – “Saab , main saamne hoon , chai ke cup mein nahin.”
Me (looking up at her) – “He he…umm , dekhiye , main aapke paise pakka dunga , and jaldi hee dunga , please kuch time de deejiye.”
She let me go with a “Theek hai saab , but please jaldee paise de dena.”
24 carat gold. That is what her heart is . You can make a dozen gold biscuits by melting her heart. She let me go. Because she understands the plight of a man who is unemployed.Yes , I am unemployed. Kangaal. I was not this way since my birth . I was born in a financially stable family. And I remebred the night almost four years back , when my dad called up. My dad is as predictable as a hindi movie , when he calls me up.
Dad – “Haan bete”
Me – “Haan papa”
Dad – “Everything fine ? ”
Me – “Perfect , papa.How is everything at home ? ”
Dad – “Perfect , bete.”
Now , I swear on Hema Malini’s eyes , Dad always asks about the padai likhai after this. But this night , he did something else .
Dad – Golu, you withdrew more cash from the ATM , did you?”
Me-“Yeah , went out to eat some popcorn , and needed the money for that .”
Dad – “So you bought some popcorn with that money.”
Me – “Yeah, salted popcorn , and a little ticket for the movie I watched while eating it.”
Dad – “Ok. See, Goluu, you shall be managing a family of your own in some years”.
Dad went on to mention terms such as money management , kid’s fees , life insurance policy , money management , family budget , house loan and money management. But then I decided to join in the conversation and before I knew , Dad was mentioning phrases such as “how dare you reply to me like that”, “what do you mean” , “shut up” , “shut up I say”. And I ended the conversation with a “Ok , main aapko apne pairo pe khade hokar dikhaunga”.I hate it when I remember dialogues from hindi movies.
So now I am standing on my own feet , without any money .Later on the things between me and dad were fine again , and he has been asking about the weather with no mention of ATM card over the last six. But I feel I have been spending too much , it is like my “andar ka accha beta” has woken up and decided to save daddy’s money .
So I have kept away my ATM card and decided not to touch it before a specified date. And the side effects have been quite stirring. At that point of time I was having only seven rupees as my cell balance . I was fine as long as I talk to people who call me up. Was fine as long as I dnt call back boys who give me a missed call and expect me to call back. But I get restless if some girl gives me a missed call and expects me to call back. In such a situation , and with seven rupees as my cell balance , I am unable to call back and am left watching my interaction with the female species drop to abysmally low quantity.
The mohalla’s departmental store wallah observes the change in my eating habits.
Me – “Woh ‘Hide and Seek’ pack kitne ka hain ?”
Store guy – "12 rupya"
Me – “Oh , who Bourbon pack kitne ka hain ?”
Store guy – "15 rupya"
Me – “Ok.cool.Ek Parle G de do.”
Store guy – “Kya navin tu bhee , Engineering college main padne walo ko bade paisa wali naukri milti hai , tab bhee Parle G ?”
Me – “Swad bhare , shakti bhare , barson se .Parle G !”
I wish I could tell you I love Parle G , but I cant tell you this , because I don’t like Parle G, never . But with a four rupee price tag(during those struggling Edays) , it looks like a creamy bourbon pack to me for that moment of time.
So I wished I cud have done all the things at right time and wish to hope that somehow , someday , when the washerwoman asks “saaab , paise denge kya ?” , I wont have to look down into the teacup.
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